• Are all Amazon book reviews written using sock puppet accounts by the author? Not buying any Ellory or Leather books. Who else do I boycott? #
  • Wonder what I'll get in the new government reshuffle? Probably nothing as usual. #
  • Minister for dog walking? Or, minister for cutting the grass? Maybe I'll have to stay as minister for emptying the bin. #
  • Those bottles of water in front of Ed Miliband look very posh. "Posh boys water" #
  • Waiting for Ed Miliband to go "Ommmmmm ". Or float upwards. That's Zen isn't it? #
  • Bank rate remains at 0.5%. What a surprise. #
  • Cider was nice at 5.3% ABV. Can't feel my knees though. Should have another 600ml bottle. #
  • The @BBCNews scroller says 'hounours list ' instead of 'honours list ' #isthatright #
  • Silly place to sit Miss Mosquito. The end of my nose. What did you expect? #
  • Not a good idea to sit on the bog reading an Argos catalogue.
    I can just about feel my legs again now. #
  • Computers are slowly taking away our mental skills. Looking at this #wordpress captcha I'm thinking "What IS 9×3= ?"
    Where's the calculator? #
  • Sorry to just hear that @pcplusmag will no longer be published. You served us well for 25 years. Hope you can rise phoenix-like soon. #
  • Just watched a really nice documentary about Nicola Benedetti on @BBCNews
    Well done #BBC #