• That was a hot sticky night. Sweaty blubber everywhere. #
  • The time to worry is when you're working 25 hour days. #
  • #MetOffice issued a level 2 heatwave alert. Does that mean we're at war with another country? I can't keep count of who we're fighting. #
  • Sun cream smells of coconut. Now I look and smell like a coconut. Stop those monkeys climbing up me. They're after my nuts! #
  • They should put loads of big speed bumps down at #HamsHall or lots of broken glass like we have on our normal pavements. 🙂 @BBCCov_Newsroom #
  • This email promises a 4 inch extension to my member. Wow I'll be able to switch the TV off from my chair. Or play fetch with the dog! #
  • Or sit in the bath and scrub my back. The possibilities are unlimited.
    Go for a wee without climbing stairs. #
  • Having a gin and tonic without the gin. #
  • Oh Teen Wolf isn't a nature film about a young wolf then? #