• Why do they still print free newspapers in ink that comes off on your fingers? #
  • This Napster radio stream is quiet or I'm going deaf. PC volume at 58. Bet a loud one comes along and blows the ornaments of the mantelpiece #
  • Writing my autobiography but I'm stuck as to what I did on the afternoon I was born. Anybody know? Probably slept or ate, followed by a poo. #
  • A fungi finding walk in Coombe Country Park? No thanks I have enough fungi sprouting up in the lawn without going out and finding some more. #
  • Brushing the dog is like combing a hairy lump of lard. #
  • So Red Sox have bought Liverpool finally.
    Maybe now Liverpool can start winning games. #
  • @napster The radio stations are pretty awesome. Are you using the web browser or a mobapp?– Browser. They were old tracks. It got louder 🙂 in reply to napster #
  • Playing the dog at draughts but she was losing so she knocked the board over deliberately. #