• 16 to win and it starts to rain. Still there's 2 days left. #
  • Swarms of snails on the march towards the house. #
  • How come I get all these sex sites following me but never anyone important like the president of Iguanaland or some such dignitary? #
  • I bet Heart Internet won't follow me now. Oh well. #
  • Why does grass grow where I don't want it to but refuses to grow where I do want it to. Such as my bald spots. Not mine…the gardens! #
  • @zeninternet Since you're asking for questions I'd like to know who left that crisp packet in my garden this morning? in reply to zeninternet #
  • Gas man due to do a service and my guts are terrible.
    I'll just have to blame the dog…as usual! #
  • I'll have to be careful when he does the CO checks in case I send the needle off the scale with an uncontrolled expulsion of methane. #
  • I wonder if the gas man follows my tweets?
    I'll know if he turns up in a gas mask.
    Mind you he could just be kinky for rubber. #
  • Wonder why Google changed their minds 180 degrees about Net Neutrality?
    Waiting for a phone call from them this morning to explain. #
  • He's on his way. Hope he's got his own spanners. #
  • That's this years service done and dusted. #
  • "Qmail conflicts with Sendmail" according to Yum. Well that's just wonderful. Yippee doody dandruff. #
  • Damn rain is stealing my satellite signal. #
  • Il pleut.
    I knew learning French at school would be useful one day. Just waiting for my Aunts pen to crop up in conversation. #
  • Pulled fridge out so it could be cleaned behind and found a desiccated beef burgher. Turned out to be the sponge from the overflow tank. #
  • Finally installed 4.02 this morning but it all looks the same. Dunno what it fixed. I should have read the stuff that came up on screen. #
  • Hmm that's a new screen. No I'm holding it upside down. #
  • Email servers on my cPanel box seem to be popular with the Chunghwa Telecom Co Ltd of Taiwan suddenly. Am I giving away free pop and crisps? #
  • I wonder what the 'Asian Babe Of The Week' plugin does? Looks like I've missed Big Breast Bonanza, Swimsuit, Nurse and Uniform weeks! #
  • I think Liverpool will win 27-0 or is that a bit over optimistic? #