• Since the story about the dog chewing a blokes big toe off I've kept my boots on. Dog is following me about with knife,fork and condiments. #
  • My latest book "How to skin a chicken using just your teeth and a comb." isn't selling too well.
    Especially in audio book format. #
  • Good heavens, Pakistan all out for 72. #
  • Has anybody turned up to watch at Edgebaston apart from a few ancient regulars and a bunch of scraggy kids? #ecb_cricket #