• I'm so excited. My pencil delivery should come today. Yes it's been a quiet week. #
  • I must stop singing Abba songs loudly. Especially "Gimme Gimme Gimme"!! What will the neighbours think?
    Well it *is* a catchy tune. #
  • I'll have to get a haircut soon I'm having trouble locating my ears. Maybe I could attach post-it notes either side of my head. L-ear R-ear #
  • If I hear the term '3D' again I'll spit. #
  • Three weeks later and I've managed to open a new box of teabags. #
  • This red berry smoothie looks like something Klingons drink and tastes like something they'd pass. #
  • Smells like a knocking shop here. What on earth is Yiang Yiang III ? Actually it smells nice but I miss my eau du fart cree par l'homme. #
  • I thought a rare bird was visiting my seed feeders. It was just a sparrow in disguise. Another bird had pooed on its head. Looked like a wig #
  • I don't know whether to take over the world or eat a cheese and marmite sandwich. #