• Why do conmen come to the door and say "I've got some good news for you…" They should start off with "I've come to con you…" #
  • Skys blue. Suns out. Birds chirping. Sheep frollicking. Me coughing and sneezing. Everythings back to normal. #
  • @BBCClick So the BBC showed last weeks Click again by mistake. I was 20 minutes in before I'd realised. Needs a new format methinks. 🙂 #
  • I think the water company have made the water thinner. Our dripping tap drips much faster now. #
  • Re Ofcoms proposal to force reduced Sky sports subs UK sports bodies say it will affect our sporting success. Which success is that then? #
  • When we collapse in cricket we do it in style. Sigh #
  • Nice drop of Port. It's from Portugal. #
  • I'll probably get gout now after drinking that port. #
  • Too many people in the house sucking up my oxygen. Sitting in my seat as well. I'm sending the dog in to recover our seat back. Woof woof. #
  • That didn't work. Somebody threw her a ball and off she trotted. #